I am totally feeling the stress of the holidays. This year we are trying to keep things low key and just enjoy the baby's first christmas.....keep it intimate family, but of course everyone always wants to butt in.....and with him being the first grandchild/ great grandchild on EVERY side of the family, I'm starting to feel a lil overwhelmed. My husband and I have never spent a christmas in our own home, we have always traveled to my parents or my relatives houses a few hours south of us. But last year after all the traveling we did in ONE day (2 hours to my parents, 45 min to my grandparents, 20 to my other grandparents, the two hours back home!!!) and I was 5 months preggo.....I refused to leave our house this year. I have told everyone that we are spending christmas with our new baby as a new family in our own home. For some reason everyone took that as an invitation to come to MY house for christmas. Someone please stop the madness!! Not only that, but they will all be back the next week for his baptism!!!!!!!! Tis the season right!?
I've had a huge feeling of guilt looming lately. Obviously I work in a mall, and I normally work opening shifts. Before the store opens we have to take the deposit from the night before down to the bank (its in the mall) and then we always go to starbucks or panaera and get coffee and breakfast. So my manager Capree and I got our morning coffee and breakfast and while walking back to the store we passed a table set up for some chairty (I dont remember what it was). You got to pick an angel off the christmas tree with a childs name on it and either make a donation or give a toy. Now of course these types of things are everywhere this time of year so I normally turn my head and try not to give it a second thought, Simply because everyone seems to want money for something and with a new baby and me not really working much...my husband and I really have nothing to give. But I think it was the fact that I had just wasted a least 5 bucks on coffee and breakfast that I didnt really need that made me feel the guilt. If I could have forgone the peppermint mocha a child coulda had a lil better christmas. So this week when I go into work on thursday, I am going to take my "coffee allowence" and donate it, it may not be much, but its all I have to give.
My dad came to stay with us this weekend....he had some meeting in daytona so he crashed at our place...seems like someone is here every weekend lately!! But its fun. I love to entertain. He even stayed over until sunday so that he could watch the baby for us while my husband and I went christmas shopping. But we decided that instead of shopping we wanted to go on a date....something we havent been able to do in a few months....at least without the baby anyway. We went and saw 007, Casino Royale......loved it! I was a lil worried that it wouldnt be my type of movie, but I got so into it that I didnt even want to leave and go to the bathroom although I had to go really bad, lol!! It was kinda long, but I never even noticed! One thing I didnt notice however, was the beginning that took place in Uganda. A few months ago, the company I work for, GUESS, produced a chairty tee and tank for the invisiable childrens fund. Its a charity that help take children out of dangerous situations in uganda, where they are forced to carry wepons and fight like grown men. The shirts (or tanks) were only like 20 bucks and also came with a dvd explaining the chairty and showing footage of what its truely like for those children over there. Of course we all (employees) bought one, but I wont watch the dvd....seeing things like that truely hurt my heart...I cant handle it. But anyway, in the beginning of the movie they are in uganda and you see children sitting around holding wepons.....it made me feel good to know that I had done at least something little to help!
We started putting up our christmas tree last night, but a string of lights was out so I have to go get more tomorrow. Suprizingly the baby is not that enamoured by the tree....he really hasnt messed with it at all. We are taking him to the mall tomorrow to get his picture with Santa....I'm so excited for him, hes going to be so cute!!! Too bad he has no clue and will never remember it, LOL! My husband and I both have a day off of work together tomorrow.....that hasnt happened in months. I'm a lil scared though becuase things have not been going well between us lately. Our marriage has been a a fast downward spiral lately and its all we can do to hold it together.
I hope tomorrow doesnt turn into some huge fight about something, like everything seems to lately. I feel like I always have to try to be on my best behavior around him these days, like I cant even relax and be myself.....I hope things get better, or we arent going to last much longer.
Well, the baby is down for the night and my husband is at work....so I guess its time to clean house and try to enjoy some time alone!!!
I've had a huge feeling of guilt looming lately. Obviously I work in a mall, and I normally work opening shifts. Before the store opens we have to take the deposit from the night before down to the bank (its in the mall) and then we always go to starbucks or panaera and get coffee and breakfast. So my manager Capree and I got our morning coffee and breakfast and while walking back to the store we passed a table set up for some chairty (I dont remember what it was). You got to pick an angel off the christmas tree with a childs name on it and either make a donation or give a toy. Now of course these types of things are everywhere this time of year so I normally turn my head and try not to give it a second thought, Simply because everyone seems to want money for something and with a new baby and me not really working much...my husband and I really have nothing to give. But I think it was the fact that I had just wasted a least 5 bucks on coffee and breakfast that I didnt really need that made me feel the guilt. If I could have forgone the peppermint mocha a child coulda had a lil better christmas. So this week when I go into work on thursday, I am going to take my "coffee allowence" and donate it, it may not be much, but its all I have to give.
My dad came to stay with us this weekend....he had some meeting in daytona so he crashed at our place...seems like someone is here every weekend lately!! But its fun. I love to entertain. He even stayed over until sunday so that he could watch the baby for us while my husband and I went christmas shopping. But we decided that instead of shopping we wanted to go on a date....something we havent been able to do in a few months....at least without the baby anyway. We went and saw 007, Casino Royale......loved it! I was a lil worried that it wouldnt be my type of movie, but I got so into it that I didnt even want to leave and go to the bathroom although I had to go really bad, lol!! It was kinda long, but I never even noticed! One thing I didnt notice however, was the beginning that took place in Uganda. A few months ago, the company I work for, GUESS, produced a chairty tee and tank for the invisiable childrens fund. Its a charity that help take children out of dangerous situations in uganda, where they are forced to carry wepons and fight like grown men. The shirts (or tanks) were only like 20 bucks and also came with a dvd explaining the chairty and showing footage of what its truely like for those children over there. Of course we all (employees) bought one, but I wont watch the dvd....seeing things like that truely hurt my heart...I cant handle it. But anyway, in the beginning of the movie they are in uganda and you see children sitting around holding wepons.....it made me feel good to know that I had done at least something little to help!
We started putting up our christmas tree last night, but a string of lights was out so I have to go get more tomorrow. Suprizingly the baby is not that enamoured by the tree....he really hasnt messed with it at all. We are taking him to the mall tomorrow to get his picture with Santa....I'm so excited for him, hes going to be so cute!!! Too bad he has no clue and will never remember it, LOL! My husband and I both have a day off of work together tomorrow.....that hasnt happened in months. I'm a lil scared though becuase things have not been going well between us lately. Our marriage has been a a fast downward spiral lately and its all we can do to hold it together.
I hope tomorrow doesnt turn into some huge fight about something, like everything seems to lately. I feel like I always have to try to be on my best behavior around him these days, like I cant even relax and be myself.....I hope things get better, or we arent going to last much longer.
Well, the baby is down for the night and my husband is at work....so I guess its time to clean house and try to enjoy some time alone!!!
posted by carolinagirl8 @ 8:34 PM
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